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Strawberry Letter: 25 Men Too Late

Dear Shirley &  Steve,

I am a 30 year old single mother of 1 boy. I’m currently in school to get my bachelors in business administration. I have a good job (which I love), and I own my very own home. I’m thankful to have good friends and family members surrounding me. My situation is that I lost my virginity at the age of 16 and it’s been downhill from there. Back then I didn’t realize my worth and I would have sex with men to get approval.

As I got older, I started having sex because I enjoyed it not realizing it may come back to haunt me later. Now that I’m 30, I’ve honestly slept with about 25 men since the age of 16. I realize this number is very high; especially compared to some of my friends. I’m now at a point where I’d like to be in a serious relationship but I fear my number of sexual partners will stop me from finding that special man; especially in the small town I live in, where some people know who I’ve slept with. At times, I feel like giving up on love because what man wants to be with a female that’s been with so many men?

I do realize my worth now and understand that I’m special but I fear I’ve already messed up any future I have to find a soul mate. Now Steve, before you wonder if I had a father in my life, I will tell you. My dad was a major part of my life; which now he’s passed. He spoiled me and was there when I always needed him. My parents were together for 35 years, up until my dad passed this year. I really need help figuring out how to position myself in a good place to find a good man who will not judge my past. There have been times I’ll meet nice men but feared if they even knew how many men I had slept with they would run as fast as they can; so I would sabotage that new friendship or would not call him.

Please help me Steve to position myself to find love before it’s too late. Unless it’s already too late?

Sincerely, 25 Men Too Late

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