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Subject: Should I Marry Him A 3rd Time?

I am a 47 year old successful Black Woman, Mother, etc; I have married the same man twice and am thinking about marring him a third time. He is a good man, a great father, a wonderful provider. We divorced after three years the first time because of an affair. I forgave him and we remarried again after three years. Things were going well. After a couple of years he started up again (another affair). I began my plan to leave again. I bought another house and moved on. He married the affair (everyone knows you never marry the affair).When she moved in (the house we purchased for our family) She began remodeling the house, spending thousands of her own money. I assume trying to remove any remembrance of his family. I believe he married her out of monetary obligation, and never thinking he had another chance with me. Eventually he realized the error of his ways and now wants his family back. The new wife is having a fit, she tried to alienate him from his children, tried to have me put in jail for calling their house when our daughter was missing, didn’t put the children in their wedding, etc, etc. He has now filed for divorce. I was the biggest problem in their marriage, yet I never interfered, (I probably should have, take back what the devil stole from me) yet he would tell me that 80% of her/their conversations were about me. When I left, he was devastated and so was I. I can’t deny that I have always loved him with all my heart. I want my family to be together, yet there are so many issues to resolve, selling one of the houses, changing the children’s schools, COMMUNICATION. I am sure that all of this can be worked out when both parties are determined to give it another chance at forever. I remember something Steve said “When a man is with another woman, it means nothing if he doesn’t love her”. I didn’t know that back then. I have let that sink in and I know that this man has always loved me. When I left, he was devastated and so was I. I guess I really don’t have a question, just would like your opinion.


Love that’s strong is patient.

Listen to Shirley & Steve respond to this letter below:

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