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Subject: Is Celibacy Ruining My Relationship

Dear Steve and Shirley, I am in my late 30’s and I have not had a lot of luck with dating in my past. The guys are just jerks that just want one thing. With that being said, I have been spending a lot of time in prayer and decided to be celibate as what I was doing in the past was not working out. I have been 3 years celibate and 3 years since I have met someone who I wanted to be bothered with. Recently I have been dating a really nice guy for about a month and a half. He knows that I am celibate and has not been pressuring me into anything. We went out last week and kissed for the first time. It was a quick kiss but OH SO NICE! The issue is that I have been having, “romantic” feelings towards him that I just can’t shake! They are so intense that recently we had an episode with sexting. I know that it was wrong but now he’s having second thoughts about our relationship because he doesn’t want me to compromise my beliefs and he does not believe in sexting I like him and I don’t want to end our relationship but I don’t know what to do. If we keep seeing one another we will wind up having relations because I am not that strong and I know that he is not. If we stop seeing one another we of course won’t be having relations but we will be apart. Although he says that he respects me. I don’t know what to do because if we have relations, will all of the feelings and respect just jump out of him? Now don’t get me wrong, Yes I am wrong for initiation the sexting but he is not innocent in this situation as he talks about my lips and my hips, etc. Not to mention that he participated in the sexting as well (boy did he participate!). I mean who doesn’t believe in sexting! If we did wind up having sex and I went away for a week is he going to leave me if I am not there to “relate” to him? Is this just a game that he is playing to get me in the sheets? Should I just let the relationship go?

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