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Strawberry Letter: My Niece Thinks I’m A Racist

Dear Steve and Shirley,

I am a 60 year old, still working at a great job, independent female. My niece and I work for the same company. I have been told I am a very good cook and I like to have dinner parties for my friends and family. My niece brings a friend of her’s (and the friend’s daughter) to dinner one evening. She introduces me to them and (this woman who just met me and called me by my first name) told her daughter, “this is Auntie So and So.”

I told the child “I am NOT your Aunt. You will call me Mrs. So and So.” I told the mother “This is 2012. We have not done the ‘aunt/uncle’ thing for your people for well over 100 years and, unless I give permission, it will not start now.” I HATE the fact that this female was so presumptuous that she would pull that crap. My niece pulled me to the side and said I was overreacting. I was ticked off because I taught her about the history our people went through and are still going through because of the mind set of people like that female she brought to my home.

She said I should apologize and I told her “like hell I will.” NOW (to further piss me off) during dinner, this female (who is married to a Black man) talks about how women like her are the only women who could make him happy. THEN used the line “once you go Black you never go back.” I finally reached my limit and said “It’s not because you don’t go back, you can’t because the men of your culture view you as tainted goods and likely will not raise a bi-racial child.”

Then I told her he must have been in a great hurry to get in the “I Got Me One, Too” club, because he could have done better. Please allow me to say, I have friends and relatives who have married lovely women outside of our race who DO NOT make a big production of being married to a “Black Man.” They simply show “this is the man I love and want to spend my life with.”

I respect and adore these ladies with all my heart – but what my neice brought to my house? Oh, I don’t think so. I am PROUD of our culture and our men and that ‘PWT’ and she hit my last nerve. Am I overreacting and set in my ways?

I am not going to change, but I’d like your opinion of the situation.

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