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Strawberry Letter 23: Self Sabotage

Dear Steve & Morning Crew,

I have a good man I’ve been with for 4 years. I recently moved and he picked up everything and followed me. He is and has been out of work for a while so he is struggling in the “provide” area as well as the “what he does” and “how much he makes” areas.

He believes I am a “keeper fish” and often gets down about not being able to do for me. I’m extremely independent and knew what I was getting into when I asked him to move here. My problem is my abandonment issue. My dad never loved me & made that clear and my mom passed suddenly 2 years ago from an illness she hid from me.

I fear each day that this man will leave me. The smallest things make me question his commitment to me. It’s getting annoying and I fear he is ready to give up on us. I’m making him miserable. I’ve even gone as far as asking him to leave because I feared he wanted to and just wasn’t telling me. He eventually came back and I have no problem being good to him but the fear of him leaving me is still there.

He has accepted me and even accepted that I’m divorced @ 27 yrs old. But I’ve left him or tried to over 50 times because of my fear of being left by him. I just want us to be happy. Please help me!