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Subject: Real Friendship, Or Just Fooled

Dear Shirley,

Good Morning all and thanks for the real advice that is given every morning on your show. I will get straight to the point. I am a 40-year-old Southern woman who loves life, my husband, my family and my friends. I am also a full-time working active duty military wife in law enforcement, and my husband and I own our own business. I always quote that life is too short to be unhappy.

Well, I had a great, fantastic female friend that was my BFF up until 2 months ago. We had keys to each other’s house (for times when my family and I arrived before she and her husband arrived from work on holiday weekends), shared Holidays together, went on trips together, and our husbands spent a lot of time together. Well, a had some work that needed to be done for my business and her husband offered to do the job, as he had done several times before, but during this short quick text conversation, RIGHT in the middle of talking about the job to be done he texted “Can I tap that”!!. I was in shock and could not even move my fingers to type another word. I quickly called my husband and told him, because we share everything and he is truly my best friend. Well, he stated you have to tell her, which I knew that I had to do, but I waited three days, and during these three days, she was calling me, emailing me saying where are you, what’s up, because we talked everyday either by phone, text, or email, starting each day off by saying, “Hey Sunshine”. Anyway I finally told her after 3 days and she said, ok. “I don’t care if you don’t ever speak to him (her husband) again, but you and I are fine, and this was his stupid mistake. She proceeded to tell me that on two other occasions that she caught him in their neighbors’ garage with his “Tillywacker” out and the neighbors’ wife in a compromising position. She was devastated so she said. She stated that he said nothing happened, and then she proceeded to say that she asked god to show her that nothing happened and that god pointed her to a verse in the bible, and after she was finished reading it, she knew nothing happened. (Wow – OK)

So, two days later, she emailed me and said, our friendship was over because she felt like me and her husband had done something together, which is totally untrue. She also told my husband that she felt that I was attracted to her husband, which again is totally untrue. I am attracted to my husband and no one else. Since then she has called my husband twice asking him business questions and he told her not to call him anymore, as they have nothing to talk about anymore.

I guess I just wanted another person’s opinion, or just tell me to let the friendship go, but when a woman has a really good friend (because we know how women can be)it is hard to really wrap my mind around that one day I had a friend, and the next day it was gone. And why is she mad at me, I didn’t do anything, it was her husband.!!! Not me.

Signed can’t wrap my mind around it!! But I know I should just give up on the friendship and let it go ,right?

Please, please, please do not use my real name if you pick this letter, as for the nature of my position in law enforcement.

Thanks so much and please keep up the good work that you are doing in the community and also in people’s life.

Listen to Shirley and guest host Kym Whitley respond to this letter below:

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