Strawberry Letter: I Need A Man’s Perspective on Strip Clubs [AUDIO]
Steve, I am a huge fan of all the work that you do and I am hoping you can give me a man’s insight of my current situation with my husband. I am 22 and happily married. I never thought I could love someone like the way I love my husband. When I first met my husband, I thought he was a gift from God above. He is a PK (pastors kid) he grew up around happily married parents, brothers and sisters.
I know that some may say that I married young but both me and my husband believed in being married before sex and living with one another. I thought that God would bless our marriage if we did everything by the book. Well, after we got married and started living together it seemed like I didn’t even know this side of him until his dark past started to haunt our new marriage on many different occasions. I recently found out from our bank statement that he went to a strip club on his way home from work and he told me that the reason why he went was because he “just wanted to see what it was like.” I am so hurt by this because when I asked him, he lied to my face and now it’s very hard to believe anything he says. This is the first time I have had to deal with him going to a strip club, but it is not the first time that I have had to deal with his dishonesty and lies.
I have given him many ultimatums to change his ways if he wants our marriage to work. He always seems to begin good, but then he gives into temption. And instead of telling me, he will keep it from me and months later I will somehow find out, one way or another God always reveals to me what he does when he thinks nobody is watching. I feel like I have exausted myself putting so much into my marriage, and not getting the same in return. I want to stay married. I love him very much and could see him being the father of my children one day. I was wondering if how I am feeling is normal, and should I stay around to see if he is willing to change to help make our marriage as pure and holy as we had both intended it to be? I have a feeling that this has a lot to do with his age.
I don’t want to give up on my marriage before God allows it to get better. This may be a test or a trial God is allowing us to go through. But will I ever be able to fully trust him the way I should?