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Subject: Is Age Really Just A Number

Hello Shirley & Steve,

I am a 41-year-old single mother of two girls, ages 19 and 7. I started seeing a 23 yr old two years ago. He is now 25 yrs old and now shows little or no interest in me. He has always been involved with older women which is where the curiosity came from, wondering what these other women saw in him. When we first got together he was serious in the beginning talking marriage & wanted to move in but I was not for it and basically did not treat him right because of his age & because I felt that he was too involved in the street which I felt is normal for someone his age. So I told him that he really wasn’t ready for a relationship and we should just be friends. I also told him that I wasn’t looking for a man when we first met. So he felt if I was just using him and stated that I lead him on and he eventually slowing faded away and now that he is gone I can’t get him out of my mind and wondering did I make a mistake. He still calls maybe twice a month and we have got back together once but it’s nothing serious. His mother is about 5 years older than me. She is also 16 years younger than his dad. I feel that it is a double standard when the man is the elder vs. the woman. My oldest daughter has no idea that he is 16 years younger than me. So my question is, Do you think it possible for a 41-year-old woman to have a REAL relationship with a 25-year-old man? I have seen it with others but I’m wondering if I should just let it go and not try to pursue anything with him.

Listen to Steve and Shirley respond to this letter below: