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Strawberry Letter: Too Much Freak For Me And Ready To Walk

Dear Steve and Shirley,

Please help!! My husband and I have been married for 13 years and he is a freak!!! The problem … is our sex lives!!! He wants it EVERYDAY, several times a day, and I am good a few times a week. (LOL!) This has been very hard on our relationship. He does not want to understand that I do not require it like he does and he is turning me OFF!!! The problem is he watches PORN videos in his spare time, which causes him to constantly stay ready. I have come home to notes posted on the door (rather vulgar), and lingerie laid out. We don’t do a lot of communicating during the day but when we do via text. His messages are always of some sexual content. He gets VERY agitated because I don’t participate the way he wants me to and then he becomes forceful. He has even grabbed me by the face leaving a mark. I have told him that he has a PROBLEM, and what he is doing is RAPE!!! But he refuses to acknowledge it as that. He is a recovering drug addict, so I have told him he just traded one addiction for another. He tells me that he is going to get it from someone else, because I don’t want to do it the way he wants me to (so sick of it … I JUST LAY THERE). I find myself saying some pretty harsh stuff that does not seem to affect him. We have tried counseling but his mind is not open enough to understand my feelings. I feel intimacy should not be planned or routine, but it should just happen. Am I wrong for this? I need some input, because I am so close to walking away.

Listen to Steve and Shirley respond to this letter below:

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