My wife and I have been married for 10 plus years, and during that time we have been constantly butting head. I think our issues stem her negative perception of me. She thinks I’m difficult to deal with, and that I don’t know how to talk to people. I don’t think that’s a widely held view. Most people find me interesting, fun loving, and enjoy my company. Whenever we disagree, I always try to find ways to prevent future squabbles, but it never works. She continues to do the very things that caused the disagreements in the first place. I can’t bring that up because it will be viewed as criticism, and guess what, another argument will occur. She views constructive criticism as attacking criticism, and she responds defensively instead of reflecting on, and acknowledging whether what was said was true or false. I love my wife, but after 10 years and knowing her as I do, I’m pretty sure she isn’t going to change. Nothing seems to work, reading the bible, teaching from our pastor, not even examples of dysfunctional relationship she hears daily in the strawberry letters. Change requires self-reflection and a decision to do it; she’s not capable of either one. I want peace, so I’m looking at the front door.